PRESS ON

Confession time, and this ones pretty obvious, my writing is sporadic at best.  I started blogging about my cancer last fall and when I started chemo I didn't feel like writing about it much less thinking about it.  I can honestly say that chemo is not only the most horrific thing I have experienced but it is the assuredly, at least at this time, the worst.  Throughout the process of treatment and feeling sick I found myself angry many times.  I cried out to God "Why me"?  I asked God why His intent was to kill me.  I was hurt, devastated, and lonely but God heard my cries and simply said "Why not you?"  I was shocked and stunned at this thought but I soon found my way into Philippians 4:11-14, that infamously misused passage of scripture.  It was there God spoke deeply into my pain and reminded me of His glory.

Paul writes "...for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.  I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound.  In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.  I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."  I read these verses and all of the sudden it was as if a light came on in the midst of the darkest night as I lay feeling nauseous and horrid.  God said "Why not you because you can do all things through Me."  For years I studied theology but in times of distress, where the rubber meets the road, God speaks and we must answer.  

For years I thought only those that played sports could abscond with this verse (not really).  Christ spoke clearly through Paul in that moment and He said PRESS ON.  Press on because in Christ we are called to be content, even when the situation is not in our favor.  Paul was beaten, shipwrecked, left for dead and yet he still was content because all he needed was Jesus.  Thats all I needed in my sickness, Jesus.  Thats all we need ever, Jesus.  In my cancer I had all I needed to make it, Jesus.  He said PRESS ON because I needed to learn to trust and lean on Him and not anything or anyone else.

All I needed was to acknowledge my need of Him.  My God is bigger than cancer and though I am still at times concerned I know He has got this.  I don't know what the next scan holds but I do know that I can do all things because Jesus, my King, is going to be in control.  I PRESS ON because He presses on through me.  Today if you are struggling let me encourage you to cry out but even more so to PRESS ON in Christ Jesus.  You cannot overcome the barrier, but He can.  PRESS ON!

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